Ugh...HONESTY

I Just saw this commercial for Chillis where five or so people are on a conference call, get put on hold and decide to play...oh snap, what's the name of the childhood game where you take the chair away and walk around in the circle until the music stops, fight over the chair? Oh, I really can NOT think of the name of that game.

Anyways, so I'm watching this commercial and the STRANGEST thing happens...I'm instantly jealous of the girl in the cute black pencil skirt and ruffled button up shirt. I mean, ya, she had the typical skinny TV figure and perfect hair, but I was jealous of something much more embarrassing...her conference call.

For the last few years I've envied the Moms who don't have to go to work every day...you know, the ones who have all this free time to work out and cook great meals and keep a spotless house all while maintaining valuable friendships and staying up on current news so that they can carry on relevant adult conversations? You know the kind. They're also called martians. Or urban legends.

I've mentioned this before, but my short experience with stay-at-home-momdom has not gone as previously hoped. Top that with spending the last two and a half weeks in Montana...land of the perfect, organic, cut my own kid's hair, grow my own food, recycle everything so that I have no trash, run 12 miles every morning while my family sleeps type of stay at home Mom and I'm waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay in over my head.

What I miss are the days at my last two jobs when my bosses would call me in to meetings (or conference calls for the sake of staying on topic here) and ACTUALLY want to know my opinion on something. I miss putting on a pressed pair of good fitting pants, a button up shirt and great heels to go to a trade show and exchange thoughts on technology in education. I miss getting up, getting ready, drinking coffee and making small talk with co-workers, I miss the relationships you make when you spend 9 hours a day with other adults. I'm jealous of the cute girl on the Chillis commercial not because she was cute, but because she was at work...albeit a fake job, but in my head it was a job where her talents held value and there was even a pay day to show for it.

I guess this is the ultimate in greener grasses issues for women.

I'm BEYOND thankful that I'm in the position to spend time in Montana when I could easily be at work wishing I was here instead...but it's still a catch-22. Being able to spend all day with my kids I get to see all of Ry's firsts and I get to be the one to teach my bigger kids new things...but I'm someone who dressed up as "a business man" for Halloween as a kid. I've always thought I'd be a super awesome bad-a$$ suit wearing business woman (or lawyer, but that's another post). So while I DO love this life, I still miss the days at the office.

Perhaps this is why play groups exist? Or MOPS maybe? Linda, Amanda...I'm not sure entirely sure what MOPS is, but in my head it's former crime fighting business women turned stay at home Moms who discuss pre-school kids whilst tackling gas prices and climate change. Correct me if I'm wrong.

So this was just me being honest. I'm sure if I went back to work (being a sales / marketing assistant as I've always been...not the awesome pistol packing suit wearing life changing business woman I many have hoped for) I'd long for the days when I could rock Ryland to sleep for her afternoon nap and play pretend with Cierra while waiting for Hunter to get home from school.

I guess that's just the honest truth about being a Mom...just one of many, right?!?!

MUSICAL CHAIRS!!!!!!!!!!!!! that was about to keep me up all night!